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So I'm headed off to America tomorrow (waking up at 5am to do it :stretcher:) and I'll be there for seven weeks! I'm spending a week in San Francisco, then heading to LA for five weeks, then off to Chicago for a week after that.

 

I've started a list of things to do (Trisha Paytas Walmart candy haul, eat a Krispy Kreme burger, go to Disneyland, etc.) but I'm always looking for new suggestions. If anyone has any good ones please let me know down below and I'll add them to my list! :hail:

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If you would've come to Virginia like you were supposed to, you could hung out with me all day while I cooked for you and we could've drank and smoked dope jk that's illegal and I don't break the law :dayfid:  and watched OITNB .... but nooooope you had to choose the other side of the country.  :vacuum:

 

I hope you get diarrhea on the plane ride there and shit your pants in front of someone super hot  :mo:

Edited by trayertrash
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"Things to do in America."

 

Ashley.

 

You'll never get the chance unless you do it now!!! $500 down payment, $2,000/hour!! 

(I take cash, and most major credit cards. Late fees and restrictions may apply. She'll do anything as long as it's BDSM. Don't even try to bring up Christian Grey or she'll murder you and we'll have more than your first $2,500. Each session only an hour and after that, the rates go up $100 a minute. If you need music to fuck to, you'll have to listen to whatever the Ashley picks. CAUTION: Whatever the Ashley may pick might not be your favorite genre, it just might happen to be Slayer's new album or Butthole Surfers. WARNING: Only condoms are used unless she says so. If she says to take it off, risk of your dick falling off from holiness, a pregnancy may occur, or internal bleeding from your soggy pussy being slain by Ashley's pussy. Ashley, also known as @trayertrash, has limitations and you have to abide by them and if not, off with your head. Both heads. Internal moaning may occur. Drowsiness, laziness, hopelessness, death, burst eardrums, and other side effects may occur. If you have hopelessness, it's okay, it's just because you know you'll never have a pussy like hers.)

Edited by Carcunt
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"Things to do in America."

 

Ashley.

 

You'll never get the chance unless you do it now!!! $500 down payment, $2,000/hour!! 

(I take cash, and most major credit cards. Late fees and restrictions may apply. She'll do anything as long as it's BDSM. Don't even try to bring up Christian Grey or she'll murder you and we'll have more than your first $2,500. Each session only an hour and after that, the rates go up $100 a minute. If you need music to fuck to, you'll have to listen to whatever the Ashley picks. CAUTION: Whatever the Ashley may pick might not be your favorite genre, it just might happen to be Slayer's new album or Butthole Surfers. WARNING: Only condoms are used unless she says so. If she says to take it off, risk of your dick falling off from holiness, a pregnancy may occur, or internal bleeding from your soggy pussy being slain by Ashley's pussy. Ashley, also known as @trayertrash, has limitations and you have to abide by them and if not, off with your head. Both heads. Internal moaning may occur. Drowsiness, laziness, hopelessness, death, burst eardrums, and other side effects may occur. If you have hopelessness, it's okay, it's just because you know you'll never have a pussy like hers.)

 

I HAVE NO FUCKING WORDS FOR THIS  :stretcher:

WHAT. THE. FUCK?!?!?! WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO  :shocked:

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If you would've come to Virginia like you were supposed to, you could hung out with me all day while I cooked for you and we could've drank and smoked dope jk that's illegal and I don't break the law :dayfid:  and watched OITNB .... but nooooope you had to choose the other side of the country.  :vacuum:

 

I hope you get diarrhea on the plane ride there and shit your pants in front of someone super hot  :mo:

 

Or I could just stay in California and enjoy the legalised weed we have in the golden state! :magic:

 

Stop being a pussy and just come to Chicago with me. :morning:

 

 

Uh, but Los Angeles it the place to be, hello.

 

Are you gonna come and pick me up at the airport tho? :vacuum:

 

 

im in maryland so idk what to do in most of those places could always go to castro street in sf or visit the armory where they shoot kink.com :)P  

 

I think I'm going to Castro St this weekend for some film festival! I hope it's as interesting as it sounds and there's a bunch of leather daddies standing around. ;)

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